thinking pattern
Emotional reasoning: treating feelings as facts
Emotional reasoning uses a feeling as proof. “I feel stupid, so I must be stupid.” “I feel nervous, so something must be wrong.”
What emotional reasoning sounds like
- “I feel like a failure, so I am one.”
- “It feels wrong, so it must be a bad idea.”
- “I feel guilty, so I did something wrong.”
Emotional reasoning examples from everyday life
situation
You feel anxious before sending a message.
the thought
“This feeling means it’s a mistake to send it.”
situation
You feel overwhelmed by a to-do list.
the thought
“I’m hopeless at managing my time.”
situation
You feel left out at a dinner.
the thought
“They don’t want me here.”
Why our minds do this
Feelings are fast and loud, and they carry real information about what matters to you. They just aren’t always accurate about the facts.
How to catch emotional reasoning in the moment
- 1Name the feeling first: “I’m feeling nervous.”
- 2Look for one fact that supports the conclusion and one that doesn’t.
- 3Ask what you’d decide if the feeling were half as strong.